A Walk with Jesus

I twisted my ankle yesterday. Its not bad; I'm positive it isn't even sprained, just soar. I stepped wrong off a curb and twisted it. I can still walk fine, with only a small limp. I iced it all last night and for a while this morning. Its really more stiff than anything. But, I am frustrated.

I have been doing SO well with my running; enjoying it a ton, learning a lot and feeling great about myself. I have a schedule to keep if I am going to be ready for the 10K in time, and a few days off was NOT in my schedule. And for the first time in a LONG time, I have the discipline necessary to actually keep on that schedule, as well as the motivation to push myself when its hard. Why now?!?

Even spiritually, things are going great. I listen to worship music when I run, take time to pray. I am seeking to learn all I can about Him through this...things were so good.

As I sat on the couch today, staring at my treadmill longingly (who would have ever thought that would happen?!?), I started asking God why now. Why in the world would I have to stop running when everything seemed to be going so great...especially when I feel spiritually great as well? No, I haven't had a lot of time to just sit and read or sit and talk or sit and listen...but I have done all of those things while I run. I feel very close to God while I run, and I feel good about myself while I run. I am killing two birds with one stone here, what's the problem?!?

That's when I realized it...God doesn't want to be a bird. (That's a quote to write on your mirror, haha). He misses me. Yeah, we spend time together while I do other things, which He loves...but more than that He loves my complete undivided attention...and He loves to give me His. Its not all about productivity with Him, its just about Him.

I am involved in a very serious and very intimate relationship with a God that I am completely in love with. Yet, it appears that there are very few times that I give Him my undivided attention. I don't ignore Him, we spend a lot of time together. But intimacy can't really be developed when my mind is also on other things and when I am distracted by plans and goals.
When I run, I am focussed on running...how far can I go, can I push myself more, etc. Its a fun time with Jesus as He is the one continuing to push me and encourage me, but it isn't intimate.

So today I went on a walk with Jesus. I am walking with only a slight limp, and my newfound love for running means that I really enjoy myself while I am walking or running. This walk was different, though. I walked with no distance or speed goals...I just walked alongside the love of my life. I talked, I listened, I limped. :) It was wonderful.

As soon as I can (I'm praying for tomorrow), I will be back on my running schedule and I will continue to focus and keep challenging myself; and Jesus will continue to be with me; strengthening and encouraging me every step of the way. But, I also want to (need to) make time to just be with Him. No plans or goals, just intimacy. Whether thats reading the bible, worshiping, praying, or just listening...I just want to be with Him. And He desperately wants to be with me.