Peter and I would be Besties

For those of you who are not teenage girls living in Philadelphia, bestie is the new term for best friends. :) And the Peter I am referring to is the apostle.

Of course, I have never met Peter, but I do know a lot about him and his character from the bible. He was very passionate and outspoken about his love for Jesus, something I can relate to. He also made some pretty huge, and public, mistakes...which I can relate to as well. I think if I was an apostle during Jesus life I would have been a lot like Peter. Can't keep my mouth shut, but with the best of intentions nonetheless.

The other day I was reading the story of when Jesus walked on water and I really saw myself in Peter. In fact, I heard (not audibly) God telling that I have been Peter recently. Talk about walking away with my tail between my legs...

Jesus had been on the mountain, alone, talking with the Father before deciding to head out to the boat that the disciples were in. They were pretty far out on the water so He decided rather than take another boat, He would just walk. On the water.

The disciples first caught a glimpse of Him on the water and were scared, thinking it was a ghost. Jesus assured them it was him, and Peter was the first to pipe up a response. Here is how I picture the scene:

Upon hearing Jesus words that it was in fact Him walking on the water, Peter thinks: "Jesus IS awesome and we just watched him feed 5000 people with very little food, so it makes sense that He could walk on water" (Peter and I think very logically). But, just because someone is walking on water doesn't mean he is Jesus. Who knows what kind of crazy things the devil could pull off. But, ONLY Jesus could give ME the strength to walk on water. Hmmm..."

Peter says: "Okay Lord, if it really is you then call me to come to you on the water"

Jesus: "Aight, come on" (Jesus' ghetto language comes out occasionally)

Peter steps out onto the water and doesn't sink. He takes one step. Then another. Then another. Still not sinking. His confidence builds quickly and he starts walking a bit faster, though not too fast. He's not sure what would happen if he tripped.

He is now far enough away from the boat that no one could reach him if he started to sink. That's okay, though, because he is walking on water!

Peter thinks: That is Jesus! I'm walking on water! This is crazy! He really is everything that He said He is!"

Unfortunately, the novelty of the walking on water soon wears off and Peter starts to feel the wind. The water from the waves starts splashing on his face. He is still walking on the water, but as his friends are becoming more and more distant, the wind and the waves seem to be increasing.

Peter thinks: "Wait a minute. I am walking on water, but I'm still getting wet. Is that supposed to happen? And the wind is picking up, what if it blows me over? Whoa, that was a huge wave, it barely missed me! What happens if a wave goes over me?? Will I walk above that? I don't understand what's going on, what am I supposed to do now??

Jesus, watching this scene unfold before Him, thinks: "Come on Peter, just look at me. I'm standing on the same water. I'm getting hit with the same wind and the same waves. Just look at me. Do exactly what I am doing and you will be fine".

Of course, Peter doesn't hear this, and is too busy wiping water from his face and staring at his feet waiting for the first sign of possible sinking. And that's when it happens. He slowly starts to sink. Panic quickly sets in and he instinctively turns toward the boat, hoping that his friends notice him sinking, hoping that they will pull him out of the water.

But, its dark and he is too far from the boat for them to see. Besides, they're busy trying to keep their own boat from sinking.

His knees are underwater, his waist..."Help me Lord!". Without hesitation, Jesus reaches out His hand and pulls Peter back on top of the water. Peter is shocked by how quickly this happens. Apparently Jesus was standing much closer to him that He realized. In fact, He was never more than an arms length away. Even in the excitement of walking on water, Peter never noticed where Jesus was. Whoops, he had been focused on the water most of the time.

Jesus looked at him with such compassion, and...disappointment. "Why didn't you just look at me? Who do you really think I am?" Peter is immediately disappointed with himself. It wasn't the first time. It certainly won't be the last.

They walk back to the boat and the storm calms down.

It really is Jesus. He really is so much more than they thought.

Jesus doesn't dwell on Peter's failure, however, which allows Peter to move on as well. He still has much to learn, much to do; no time to dwell on the mistakes.

That's my take on the Peter walking on water story. And I see my name written all over that.

"Oh yeah, Jesus, we can do this whole life thing together. It will be sweet. You are God, so I can trust you with everything!
But wait a minute....
My dad has cancer, what if I don't get married before he dies. My dad might not get to walk me down the aisle!
Oh wait, I'm 28 and still single. Almost all of my friends are married, in a relationship or having babies. What if I never get to experience any of that?
Hold up; I've been living in Philly for 6 years and things seem to be getting harder and harder. Even Bonita and Linda are making really bad decisions. What's up with that?!"

Sinking...sinking...

Thankfully, I am finally hearing what Jesus has been trying to say to me.

"Trish, I'm out here standing on the same water as you. Just look at me. No, don't look at them, look at me. Do exactly what you see me doing. You will stay on top of the water, just like I am. Ignore the wind and the waves, I have total control over them and will not let them overtake you. Just keep looking at me"

Okay, I have to say that at this point all I can think of is: "Here's lookin' at you; Jesus". Haha, anyway...

So, that's Peter's and my story. Walking on the water with Jesus trying not to focus on the storm all around me. Just keep my eyes on Him, and He will take care of the rest.

Jesus, I need your help to even do that.

"I know Trish. That's why I'm standing right here"

Thanks Jesus.

"Anytime"