Really Fun Day!!

Okay, so after my depressing post on anger, I thought I would share a little bit about yesterday, because it was SO FUN! After church a bunch of us headed to Center City for lunch, and of course I took the girls. We had lunch in a mall and had fun walking around and taking pictures. It was a beautiful day outside, so we decided to walk around a bit, taking more pictures. We ended up at one of Philly's gorgeous fountains and, of course, took more pictures. We were even joined by a Star Wars Storm Trooper for some photo ops! (There is a Star Wars exhibit at the Franklin Institute, right by the fountain).

We took so many wonderful pictures, I FINALLY decided to set up my own picture album on line. You can check out ALL of my pictures here. You can also click on the "Trish's Phanfare Pictures" on the right and check them out. I'm going back and adding tons of pictures from the past few years, but its going to take a while, so check back often and you'll find new (old) stuff!

Okay, here are some of the best pictures from the day! (But don't forget to check out the full album HERE!!)

Anger...sometime righteous....sometimes not...

I was awakened at 2 a.m. this morning by 6 gun shots. I spent my first few years in Philly hearing occasional fireworks and often wondering if they were gun shots. Now I know they weren't. Gun shots are unmistakable, and they will jar you out of the deepest sleep.

I don't know what happened after the gun shots. I called the police, but I wasn't even really sure where the shots were coming from. They were NOT right outside my window, and sounds bounce off row homes like you wouldn't believe. I pray it was just kids shooting in the air (and no one got hurt).

I was not angry that I was awakened, nor that I live in an area where that happens. (Okay, sometimes I get angry about that...but not this morning). I chose to live here. I was angry that the kids that I have worked with have lived with those sounds all their lives. I was angry that too many of them have witnessed a shooting, know someone who have been shot, or have been shot themselves.

What really makes me angry about that is that the majority of the city doesn't care about that. Most of the crime and violence in this city boils down to pride. I want something, and I will have it, no matter the consequences. When you drive in the city, you often find people crossing the street (when you have a green light) at a very leisurely pace. They do what they want to do.

Now, I am not saying that everyone in the city is like this. In fact, I really do love this city, and the people in it. For every negative experience, there are plenty of good ones. Still, the bad continues to mount.

Women want babies so they get pregnant. Babies are cute, why not have one? When that baby is walking and talking, its a lot more work and not so cute, so they ignore that child and decide to have another baby. Another baby is not just cute, its also more money. When that baby gets older, she starts over. Women are great at having babies. Few even attempt to raise them.

I know a 2 year old that doesn't have a bed time. She stays up until all hours of the night watching television while the rest of her family sleeps. She is the oldest of 3 and has been pushed aside for a while. She regularly falls asleep throughout the day, whenever she's tired. No one really pays attention to her anyway.

She's 2 and already her development has been hugely affected by simply not having a bed time.

I'm angry that people in my neighborhood choose not to use trash cans. I regularly watch people eat food and just drop the trash on the ground. I have to work hard to teach the kids not to do that. Such a simple way to clean up the neighborhood...

I am angry that my kids know exactly what a drug deal looks like. I'm angry that they don't know that Philadelphia is not a state, but they do know the words to every nasty song about sex that is played on the radio.

I'm angry that I am the only virgin any of the God's Girls know; and there are few in their lives telling them that they are worth saving themselves.

I have been struggling with anger a lot recently (can you tell? haha). The core of that struggle is righteous anger. Anger directed at sin and evil and the horrible affects I see all around me. However, sometimes that comes out as anger toward a driver driving too slow, or someone whistling in the store (I think whistling is one of the most annoying sounds in the world, haha). Right now the righteous anger is leading me to sin...I want it to lead me to pray.

I've started to believe that God is ONLY the God of redemption, and that has skewed my view big time. I believe 100% that God can and will redeem everything for His glory. But, do I believe that God is big enough to change hearts and lives for good?

Do I believe that God can redeem a teenage girl who gets pregnant? Absolutely! Do I believe that He can work in her heart so that she won't get pregnant? I don't know...

What I see around me are situations in need of redemption. What I want to see is people in need of a Savior. God is Savior just as much as He is Redeemer.

People in my neighborhood are standing at the edge of a cliff about to step off. I need to believe that God can pull them off the ledge just as easily as He can catch them on His wings when they step off. Shoot, I'm on the cliff myself all too often, and he has pulled me back more times than I can count. Why can't I believe that He will do that for those around me?

I'm not there yet though...but I know I'll get there. I have to get there, or I certainly won't make it here.

I Finally Hit My Breaking Point...

I know, everyone was wondering when it was going to come; including me. After weeks of ridiculous computer issues and piles and piles of work backing up...in the midst of personal tragedies in so many people's lives around me, I finally got fed up today. Ironically, this comes at the same time that most of my "issues" are being resolved.

To start, my AIM computer is fixed and working. Other than the fact that I can't get my printer to install (which is annoying, but pretty minor), I finally have a real working computer that I am not borrowing! On the same note, I got an email from a great friend and supporter about a great deal on a lap top that he found. He is a licensed computer guy, so he is going to buy the laptop for me, load it with tons of free software (including Microsoft Office! Since he is a computer guy he can save me tons of money getting me all this stuff!) and then send it to me!! How amazing is that?!? Not only do I NOT have to worry about finding the right computer (he actually knows what he is doing), but I also don't have to worry about installing stuff and messing it up (obviously I do not have a good track record with this stuff, haha). Its AMAZING!

So, for all intents and purposes, I am back on track. Some things are still taking much longer than they used to, but that will change as I get the right files on this computer. The main frustration is the loss of standard emails that I would send out for my job that I now have to recreate, as well as all the lost email addresses. Again, a little frustrating, but definitely manageable.

I also finally filed my taxes and I am getting a refund this year! Hopefully this will help offset the costs of some of the repairs and other things I have done on my house...what a blessing!

I know what you're thinking...if things seem to finally be coming together, what in the world could have set me off today? Well, here's the story... (now we enter into a quick rant/soap box...feel free to skip if you are uninterested).

We have a bulletin board up at church that has individual pictures of all the Kids' Club kids. About the same time as my hard drive crash, I took several new pictures of kids to add to the board (they LOVE having their pictures up!). My plan was to have them printed and ready to go the next week...unfortunately, as of this morning, they still weren't up.

As I was doing some work earlier I realized that Jen's computer (the one I had been borrowing over the weekend), had some pretty decent photo editing software on it. All of the pictures needed to be edited and then the kids' names added to them. Jen's software would allow me to do that. The kids have been begging me for weeks to get their pictures up, so I decided to try and get it done today.

I spent close to (if not more) 2 hours editing and adding names to over 20 pictures of kids to add to the bulletin board. Once I was finished I loaded them onto CVS's on line photo site and sent them off for 1 hour printing.

Around 3:30 (I have to be at Kids' Club at 5:30) I went to pick them up. I (stupidly) did not check the photos before I left, but opened the package a few minutes later while waiting at a red light. What I discovered was that most of the kids faces were literally cut in half, and the ones that weren't cut in half had been printed landscape style instead of portrait. I immediately turned around and went back to CVS.

There were MANY people in line waiting for photo help and only one person working there, so I ended up waiting in line for 25 minutes (no exaggeration). When I finally got to the counter, I showed the pictures to the lady working there and her words to me were; "All I can do is give you a refund, that's how the pictures came to us". Did she check to see if that was true? No. Did she offer to check and see if maybe, possibly, they had made a mistake in printing? No.

So, she started to process the refund. Admittedly, I was a bit irritated by this point, but I am very capable of being cordial even when irritated...at least for a while. While she started to process the refund I asked her why the pictures would show up fine on the website and then come to them cut in half. She did not respond. I again asked her what could have caused this problem, and she again ignored me. Her manager came out to verify the refund and I (in a much more firm tone) again asked why my pictures would come to them messed up if they looked perfectly fine on line. The manager simply looked at me, shrugged and then went into her office.
The photo lady proceeded to hand me my receipt and then looked over my shoulder to help the person behind me. Never once did she speak to me or even look at me.

That's when I went over the edge. No, I didn't say or do anything, however I have a letter of complaint that I will be delivering to the store tomorrow. And I had to work VERY hard to keep myself under control as I left the store. I finally left the store around 4:45. I went home and spent some time gathering myself so I wouldn't take any anger out on the kids.

And, I will not be going to CVS anytime soon.

As I was thinking about this later tonight, I discovered why this incident is the one that sent me over the edge. My computer issues have been frustrating and tiring, but they are no one's fault (well, someone is behind this sinister plot...my dad thinks its the CIA...but we're still gathering evidence) and all the people I have come in contact with throughout the process have been extremely nice and helpful. Even the people at DHL apologized profusely after my hard drive was stolen when they left it on my front porch. There was nothing they could do to change it, but they were at least willing to admit that they had made a mistake. The people at Dell have gone above and beyond to try and get me the things I needed, which made everything so much less stressful and frustrating than it could have been.

The CVS situation was different. I was treated like I didn't matter...like I wasn't worth it...and that made me angry. Even an, "I'm so sorry. I am not sure what happened, but let me check and see what we received. Okay mam, after looking at what was sent to us, it does appear that this is how we received the pictures. I'm not sure why the pictures were sent to us like this. Maybe you could try putting them on a CD and bringing that in to us? I will give you a full refund for these pictures, and I really wish that there was more I could do." Is that difficult? Isn't that their job?!?

What I have discovered today is that I like to be treated as a person. As a person that matters. The golden rule absolutely applies to me. I want to be treated exactly as you would want me to treat you. And, I feel a huge sense of injustice when I am not treated that way.

Honestly, I am still pretty frustrated with the whole situation (hence the letter. I'm not good at letting things slide...). But, I am praying that God will use this to teach me about how I should/do treat others. I pray that I treat them as they should. In a very small way, I understand the anger, hurt and frustration that comes along with being treated as if you don't matter.

But everyone matters. People kill themselves because they think they don't matter. People do drugs and drink too much because they think they don't matter. Women prostitute themselves because they think they don't matter.

So, will I show people that they really do matter?

I Have Another One!!

Meet Natalie! She is Bonita and Linda's niece and she has recently started coming to church with us on Sundays. She is only 2 1/2, which is too young for Kids Club and most of our other programs, but she really enjoys church. She is the oldest daughter ofBonita and Linda's oldest sister, D. D had Natalie when she was 16, and now has 2 other children as well. Natalie is sweet and beautiful, but also a hand full. She doesn't like the word no, and isn't used to hearing it (being in a family of 3 kids, all only a year apart, means she gets overlooked a lot and is able to get away with most anything). Not so with me! Its going to be interesting for both of us...


We had a really good day today at church. Monique and Tasha dressed up and looked SO BEAUTIFUL! We had fun at church (I went down and played with the kids in children's' church) and then the 6 of us ladies went to lunch afterward. The rest of the day has been pretty relaxing as I continue to get things done, but in a very laid back way (I should be cleaning my house right now, but I just can't make myself do it, haha). As I was taking the girls home we decided to pull over at the park by my house and take some Easter pictures. I'm no professional photographer, but these girls are so beautiful it doesn't matter. Enjoy!!

My Cat Has Been Brainwashed...

I know it appears that my conspiracy theories are getting a little out of hand, but I'm telling you, something is going on!!

In the last 3 weeks I have gone through 4 hard drives, 4 power chords and 2 computers...and I'm working with a borrowed computer right now until I can get something more permanent. You have all heard the stories of the hard drives and the computers, so here's the info on the power chords.

Gizmo apparently loves to chew them up. In fact, he chews them to shreds. I have seen bite marks on my computer chords before, but he has recently stepped up his destruction. He doesn't chew on any other chords, just the computer power chords!! I mean, come one! First, he chewed up my computer chord, which didn't really matter cause my computer died. Then I borrowed a friend's laptop and he chewed her chord (thankfully its still under warranty so she can replace it easily). Next, the AIM computer. This one he destroyed almost chewing it into 2 pieces. (And before you start to wonder, he does this in a matter of minutes without me knowing about it. He's very sneaky!).

After he chewed up the AIM chord I went and bought a universal power chord that for some reason doesn't work on that laptop (although the manual says it should). I can't seem to find a new power chord on line, but I'm hoping that's the only problem with the laptop. It doesn't turn on at all now, so we'll see...

Finally, I borrowed a computer from my future roommate Jen, which is the one I am using now. And you guessed it, Gizmo chewed up her power chord as well. Thankfully, her computer will accept the universal power chord, so I can use that until the new power chord arrives.

My cat is out to get me!! Whoever is behind this conspiracy to drive me crazy (they must be VERY powerful people) have managed to get to my cat and convince him to be a part of their plan! I am now working on re-educating him and bringing him back to my side. I have bought treats to bribe him, and sticky paper (normally used to keep cats from scratching the furniture) to wrap around my computer cords. This conspiracy will not bring me down!!

In other news, I got A TON accomplished today with having a working computer. I finished and printed my newsletter and it will go in the mail on Monday. I also updated pretty much everything that needed to be updated, did my laundry, returned the 2 hard drives I still had, paid several bills, responded to all the AIM emails I could...which are only the ones I have received since Thursday (most of the 170 emails are waiting for me on the AIM computer that is dead) and even started my Kids Club lesson. I am hoping to have all my Kids Club stuff ready by tomorrow night so I don't have to worry about whether or not I have a computer on Tuesday. I also REALLY need to clean my house as well(the sleepover girls did a pretty good job straightening up, but they left my basement a mess, and there are several dishes in my sink), but that's last on my list since I can do that without a computer. I don't know how long Jen will let me keep hers, so I want to catch up as quickly as possible!!

In the meantime, my cat is baned from my room (where I keep the computer) until he can prove to me that his allegiance lies with me and not the conspirators. He doesn't like it, but he must face consequences for his actions. That'll teach him! :)

Teen Sleepover!!

For years in our teen ministry (at least since my involvement with the teens) there has been an awesome community among the guys and little to none among the girls. I have been praying for years that we would see the growth among the girls that we have been seeing in the guys.

Well, recently God has been answering that prayer in a big way!! Many of our teen girls are seeking God with all their hearts and growing incredibly. And as they grow individually, they are growing as a community of sisters as well. Its so wonderful!

On Tuesday night after Kids Club I had a sleepover with several of the girls at church (they are on Spring Break), and we had SO MUCH FUN!! The girls stayed up pretty much all night laughing, talking and doing each others' hair.


I expected them to want to go home pretty early the next day, but none of them wanted to. So, we got up (most of us pretty late since we stayed up so late) and went to lunch together. After lunch I had work to do (this was the one day that my AIM computer actually worked) but the girls still wanted to stay, so they hung out in my living room talking and laughing while I worked. It was great!!! The girls range in age from 13-18, yet they all got along and had fun together.

That night we headed to Jen's parents' house for a barbecue and to talk with a missionary from Kenya. We had a really great time there as well and left really encouraged.

I didn't drop the last girl off until midnight, meaning that we had all spent over 24 hours straight together. The crazy part is, they all want to do it again as soon as possible!! :)