Sadness

I promise (fo real fo real) to write more about this later, but I am packing now to fly to Virginia tomorrow (technically I am flying into North Carolina and then driving 2 hours into Virginia, but you get the idea).

Why? Well, this past weekend a good friend from high school, Laura, committed suicide. Those of you who know me know that I am still very close to many of my high school friends. In fact, many of them are my supporters financially and ALL of them support me in prayer and encouragement. We all talk/email/facebook regularly, see each other as often as possible and even went on a big vacation together a few years ago with plans to do it again asap. It doesn't make sense outside of God's blessing, but over the last 15+ years (some of us met in junior high, others in high school); despite going to different colleges, moving to different cities, getting married and having kids, and each of us going through all kinds of changes, we have managed to all stay close.

Devastated, sad and confused are the only words I can think of to describe how I feel right now...yet they don't even begin to encompass everything. Please pray for her family.

I got the phone call on Sunday (she was found on Saturday) and by Wednesday literally ALL of my close friends from high school (including me) had plans in place to be in Roanoke by Friday for the Memorial Service. We are praying that we can be an encouragement to Laura's family as well as one another.

My friend April is flying in from Indianapolis and was able to get a flight with a layover in Philly, both going to and from North Carolina. Thankfully I was able to get on the same flight as her into and out of North Carolina. I think the least amount of time I have to spend alone the better (which is unusual for me!).

I fly out tomorrow (Thursday) and will be back in Philly Sunday morning in time for church. Its going to be a quick trip, but I am SO thankful that I am able to go. I don't know many people that are still so close to so many of their friends from high school; I feel incredibly blessed.

Now, I am off to one of the hardest weekends of my life. She was an incredible woman and actually one of the first people to introduce me to missions. Yet, at 30 years old she was so overwhelmed by darkness and depression she felt that her life was not worth living. I can't even imagine the despair that overwhelmed her at the end of her life. I am praying that she is finally at peace, but it will be a while before those of us left to mourn her find that peace again.

My friend April said it perfectly: I am grieving the loss of someone who was deeply loved by God and never understood it.