Our first full day

Well, we have completed our first full day here, and this vacation continues to live up to its name. I feel like I'm in a dream, its so amazing!!! Instead of just going into boring details, I will tell you the story of our day in pictures:

Our morning started with this:


Pedro waws walking outside to eat his breakfast (a bowl of cereal) and he thought the glass door was open. It wasn't. :)

We spent most of the day on the beach, and most of that time was spent in the water. Did I mention that the waves are PERFECT for these guys?!?

Here is Luis showing off his pink water shoes. :) (They are really Kiara's)

We had a lot of fun in the water. :)






When they weren't in the water, the kids spent time burying each other in the sand...

And building sand castles.

We spent all morning at the beach, came in for lunch, relaxed a bit at the house, and then headed back to the beach for a few hours in the late afternoon. The kids are allowed to go to the beach without me or Shera as long as they are not alone and are with either Lindsay, Luis or Zuley (the 3 oldest). (They are not allowed in the water unless Shera and/or I are there). The funny part to me is that they generally do things as a whole group. These are some great kids.

Shera and I needed to make a grocery store run, so we left the kids at the house and ran our errands. We were gone much longer than we expected (Zuley, who is 18, and Lindsay, who is 16, were with the kids) and we expected to return to a trashed house with several kids mad at each other while the rest demanded dinner.

Instead, as we turned the corner to the house we saw all the kids run inside. Quite suspicious. As we unloaded the groceries, we couldn't find any kids. However, when we went back to the car to get the rest of the bags, we found the car full of all of the kids. They then jumped out of the car pretending to be zombies and chased me and Shera all around and through the house. It was hilarious!! Apparently they spent the whole time planning this prank and even ran inside several other times thinking they had seen our car. I love these kids.

For dinner tonight we grilled hot dogs and hamburgers...and had so much fun doing it!

Each kid is responsible for cleaning up their own mess at breakfast and lunch, and we have meal crews that are responsible for the dinners. (We only have 5 dinners here, so we split into pairs so each of us is only responsible for one dinner). Miguel isn't tall enough to reach the sink to do the dishes, but he makes it work. :)

After dinner we decided to go for an evening stroll on the beach. That quickly turned into crab catching, and I literally watched all 9 of these kids work together to catch crabs for over an hour. There was a lot of screaming, running and laughing. We all had a blast.

And they caught several crabs...

So, now we're all back at the house getting ready for bed. We don't have bed times this week, but we do have "in your room" times. Last night that led to a very late night for the kids, but we are all so tired, I think tonight might be different. We'll see though...

For now, they are all crowded around the TV taking turns playing Guitar Hero on PlayStation (yes, we brought one with us...as well as an Xbox. They were calling for rain and I wasn't going to take any chances!).

Tomorrow will be another full day at the beach. We can't wait!!

(Oh, and a funny story I forgot from yesterday. I knew this was going to be a great week from the get go. Once we all got in the cars and were heading out of Philly, Miguel grabbed a bag of chips, banged them on Lindsay's head and yelled: "Woohoo! Vacation!". He is ridiculous. How blessed am I?!?)

The Dream Vacation

I left Philly this afternoon in a van full of kids, with Shera behind me in a car full of kids and we embarked on what I told everyone was going to either be the best week of my life, or the worst week (there will be no in between). If today is any indication of how the week will go, it will definitely be the BEST week of my life!!

We have had so much fun so far!! Sadly, Dario decided not to come with us (17 year old boy, wants to be with his friends...), but we have already talked to him and he already regrets his decision. Unfortunately, 5 hours is a bit too much for me to turn around and pick him up. I feel kinda bad for him, but it made me think how many times I miss out of the good things God has for me simply because I don't know what they are so I stick with what's comfortable. Anyway...

The car ride here was fun. I had Pedro, Miguel, Luis, Lindsay, Tasha and Linda in my car. The boys spent a good amount of time on their portable play stations while the girls and I enjoyed music. We did have a lot of fun as a group as well, playing some silly games, and laughing constantly at Miguel and Luis. They are both SO funny, and so clever!!





(Miguel is playing with Lindsay's hair in this pic)

I hear the other car (with Shera, Zuley, Bonita and Monique) also had fun, mostly dancing and singing.

I have to tell you that I think I have some of the most hilarious kids in the world with me on this trip. Here are some highlights to prove my point:

* As we are driving into Delaware we pass several neighborhoods that do not have corner stores (which are very common in Philly). Pedro asked, "How to they get milk if they don't have corner stores?" Miguel responded, "They each have their own cow". (He was completely serious).

* Apparently I like the car a bit colder than the rest of my crew, so at one point during the trip the kids decided to turn the heat on with the rear controls in the van. As the heat hit his face, Luis yelled: "Viva Mexico!" (This one made me laugh so hard I cried).

* In the great state of Maryland, there is a city called Pokomoke. The name made us all laugh hysterically and we decided to turn pokomoke into a verb. So, when someone is doing something extremely annoying, they are now pokomoking you. Aren't we creative?

This is just a sampling of the hilarity that comes from these kids. We also got to drive on the Chesapeake Bay tunnel/bridge which was pretty sweet. It takes about 20 minutes to cross it, which makes you feel like you are just driving on the ocean. We were all in awe of that.

(This pic was taken from the bridge)

We finally arrived at our beach house around 7, and discovered that it was even nicer than I thought!! Its not huge, but perfect for us. We have 4 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms and its all on one level; and we even have a small screened in porch. To the kids, this place is paradise. Shera and I were so excited by how nice it is, we just screamed. :)

Of course, the first thing we did (after unloading the cars) was take a walk to the beach. Our house is not on the beach, but only about half a row back, so its a quick walk. Since it was getting late, I didn't want to deal with swimsuits and such so I decided we would just go put our feet in and tomorrow we would actually get in the water. That wasn't a good idea...

The minute they all saw the water they took off running and much splashing ensued. It wasn't long before we were all soaked anyway, so we just went swimming. The water here is PERFECT. We are right on the corner of the Chesapeake bay and the Atlantic Ocean, so we don't really have waves, its very calm. I actually like waves, but the calm waters are perfect for my group of small, inexperienced swimmers that are scared of the ocean.

At one point, Monique looked at me, laughing and splashing and said, "Trish, this feels like a dream!". Shera and I had actually already labeled this vacation the dream vacation because of Martin Luther King Jr's speech. We felt like this trip was such an example of the dream he had. Monique just gave us another reason to keep the name. :)

We have had a few hiccups in getting along, but they came later at night when tiredness was setting in. Overall, they are all doing GREAT! Tomorrow and Monday we will simply spend the day at the beach, hanging out. We can't wait!! We have some other fun activities planned throughout the week, so stay tuned! (I'm so excited we have internet here!!)

Class of 2008

Graduations in Philly are by far my favorite occasions to celebrate. Puerto Rican day is a lot of fun, Fourth of July is usually exciting as well, but nothing compares to graduations. Around here ALL graduations are cause for a HUGE celebration. There is no difference to the amount of time, money and energy spent celebrating high school graduations than kindergarten graduations. Every graduation is a BIG deal, and I love it!!

In Philly you will be a part of 4 graduations...kindergarten, 5th or 6th grade (depending on your elementary school), 8th grade and then high school. I have been to at least one of each of these ceremonies (except a kindergarten one) over the last 2 days, and I can assure you that the level of excitement is consistent across the board...and its awesome. At each one I felt like I was at a mini prom or wedding as everyone was dressed in their best, with hair and nails done to perfection (for the girls), and some of the sharpest suits I have ever seen on the guys. You don't just look nice, you look red carpet ready.

My favorite part is that graduations are truly a celebration. The schools try to keep some semblance of tradition, but friends and families are not daunted. Their pride and joy over the accomplishments of their children can not be contained, nor do I think it should be. The great part is, everyone is like this, so no one is bothered by anyone else. When one family screams uncontrollably for their child, everyone else just claps along, waiting for their turn. If you push in front of someone to get a picture of your child, they will gladly move out of your way knowing they will do the same to you in a few minutes. The whole auditorium is filled with joy, and its amazing. (Of course, there are some exceptions cause there's always someone who tries to mess it up). There is a camaraderie in the room as all the families understand what an amazing accomplishment it is for their kids to graduate, and that produces a shared respect as families look around the room and understand each other. They all understand the obstacles their children have overcome as well as the hard work each of them have poured into their kids. And because of that, everyone is excited for everyone else.

I really think that graduations in Philly are a glimpse of what heaven must be like when you first get there. You arrive, dressed fabulously, looking around at everyone else who persevered alongside you while family members who arrived long before cheer, knowing the amazing road ahead for you. Okay, maybe that isn't what heaven is like, but its a fun thought. :)The first graduation I attended yesterday was for Jones middle school (an 8th grade graduation). Several of our teens attend Jones and I got to see 8 of my favorite teens walk across the stage and prepare for the next step in their lives. One of the teens, J, received 3 separate awards for his improvement in grades, behavior and attendance and the teachers could not stop gushing about how far he has come. Another teen, T, received an award for excellence in leadership and athletics and as I held her 2 little brothers in my lap, I cheered (okay, and cried) along side her mom, both of us understanding that this graduation means so much to their entire family. I was so excited to see so many familiar faces at this graduation. Here are the pics I snapped of the teens that I knew from church:














After the Jones graduation, I headed to the Kensington High school graduation to see M finish out High School. She received an award for excellence in English and while she didn't seem to think it was a big deal, I know just how rare women like her are, and I'm so thankful that she is a role model for Bonita and Linda.


The final 3 graduations are especially significant to me, and I have to admit, MANY tears of joy were shed from my eyes over the last 2 days over these final 3 graduations.






Bonita graduated from 6th grade, Luis graduated from 8th grade, and Zuley graduated from HIGH SCHOOL!! I am SO proud of them!!! Zuley is the first in her family (but certainly not the last!) to finish high school!! Here are Luis and Zuley showing off their diplomas:



Quick side note: for the first year since the kids moved in with me, ALL of them passed (Bonita, Linda, Dario, Luis and Zuley), with no summer school!! Next year will be Kiara's 8th grade graduation, and the year after that (Lord willing), will be Dario's high school graduation!!!

Finally, I just had to add this picture in, because it captures these 3 loves of my life so perfectly. Notice Dario appears to be loving on Bonita, but (if you look at his face), you can see that he is actually trying to squeeze her as hard as he can. Bonita has a priceless look on her face as she tries to smile for the camera, but can hardly breath because her big brother is torturing her. And if you look closely, you will see that Luis snuck himself into the background of the picture...which he did completely on purpose. He is the mischievous one. :)

I'm a Leader??

It’s been another week (or more!) since I have blogged, which means you should probably get ready for a long one. Go ahead and grab your coffee, close the door (to prevent distractions) and make yourself comfortable, cause here we go!

I thought about just running though the highlights of the week to let you know that I’m alive and well and God is on the move, but I think that would make this last week a big waste. The things that happened last week will give you an amazing glimpse into what my life is like (which I am assuming you care at least a little about since you are reading this blog), and my thoughts and reactions to those events will give you a good understanding of where I am spiritually and emotionally (I’m hoping to understand that better myself!). So, let my thesis begin:

Last week marked the beginning of my return to leading AIM trips. I have helped lead several trips over the last few years, but it has been almost 2 years since I led one by myself. Let me start by saying, I LOVE leading AIM trips.

Time constraints have been my excuse over the last 2 years as to why I haven’t lead trips, but fear has been the real reason. I have struggled a lot with my role as a single woman in leadership for a while and at the beginning of this struggle I took a step back from being in authority (whenever I could) and actually asked God to put other people in my place. He had other plans.

I won’t go into the day to day events of the week, but here is the breakdown:

- S Sunday night we witnessed a mom lose control and completely freak out on her kids. She was carried out of her house by 4 police officers while her 2 children watched, screaming and crying.

On Monday, while cleaning the alley behind my house, we discovered a large bag full of cocaine (thousands of dollars worth). We called the police. The bag is still there.

O On Thursday we watched a father drag his daughter out of the house by her hair. We then saw a man run out of the house. The father proceeded to chase him down, shoot him several times and then drag his daughter back into the house by her hair. The father was arrested, but I do not know what happened to the man he shot.

About an hour after that I say a 13 year old boy on the side of the road covered in blood. As I stopped to check on him, his mother came to me…very angry…and told me she is the one who made him bleed. Apparently he needed to learn a lesson. I left and called the police.

- The AIM groups left Friday morning and on Friday night 3 of the teens from church asked me if they could spend the night at my house because they needed someone to talk to. As we were driving to my house we passed an accident with a woman lying face down in the middle of the street (we drove up seconds after the accident happened). I don’t know if she lived.

- A About an hour after that we received a phone call that the church was possibly on fire. We quickly got in the car and drove toward the church to see what was going on. It wasn’t the church that was on fire, but 3 houses behind the Hope House were in flames. Our car was blocked in by emergency vehicles, so we stood outside for over an hour watching the houses burn, praying with the neighbors. (As far as we know, no one was killed).

Okay, let’s add this all up. In one week, I:

-watched kids scream while their mother is taken away from them

-found a huge bag of cocaine behind my house

-saw a man get shot

-met a kid covered in blood at the hands of his mother

-watched 3 houses burn to the ground

I called 911 3 times this week.

Just writing that overwhelms me. That list doesn’t even include the issues I had to address throughout the week with the AIM teams, the rat in my kitchen (which I will elaborate on more in a future blog post), or the gut wrenching conversation that I had with 3 teens on Friday night about what to do after you have been raped. This was a hard week.

Before I say anything else, I have to say…God is Good.

One of the biggest things that God has been doing in my life over the last several months is challenging and stretching me in the area of authority and leadership. While plenty of people have told me that I am gifted in the area of leadership, I don’t see it in myself. In fact, when it comes to the roles of leadership I am in now, I can’t shake the feeling that I am only in this position because Carisa doesn’t want it anymore.

I WANT to be in the background. That is so much more comfortable for me. More than that, though, I don’t want to have to face the things that I faced this week. I’m not talking about the specific events (though those were no picnic). I don’t want to have to face the questions and emotions that came along with those events all while having people look to me for guidance. I don’t believe that leaders have to have all the answers, but I do believe that they should be open and honest and vulnerable in their pursuit of those answers. I especially don’t want to be vulnerable.

The truth is, it’s easier for me to stand next to someone who is standing on the promises of God. As a leader, I have to stand firm on those promises myself. It is easier for me to find someone I trust and seek them for answers. As a leader I have to find the answers for myself. It is easier for me to go the direction someone tells me to go. As a leader, I have to be the one looking at the map. There were so many times this week where I found myself looking around for answers only to find all eyes on me. I had to look up. And this is where it gets tricky because I am not saying that it is my job to find all the answers for everyone else, but it is my job to show them where to look. That feels like too much responsibility to me.

Over the last year, more and more responsibilities have been dropped on my plate and I can’t say that I’m happy about it. Do I think its God doing this? Yes. I’m still not happy about it. I want to be a follower, not a leader. (This is not to say that I’m not controlling- I do struggle with that. Control is different than leadership, though). I worked well with Carisa, enjoyed our friendship very much and felt good about the path I was on. I had no idea where that path was leading, and that’s a good thing. Had I known it would lead here, I would have gotten off a while ago.

The other day on Carisa’s blog she listed all of my responsibilities as a part of the children’s ministry (many of them her former responsibilities), and I got tired just reading it. The list didn’t even include my 25 hour a week part time job, my role in my god-children’s lives or my involvement with the teens.

As I read the list, I discovered that my struggle was not with the specific responsibilities I have, nor the number of responsibilities. My struggle is with facing those responsibilities (and everything that comes along with them), alone.

I don’t have anyone to take my questions, doubts, discouragements, or fears to (except God, I know. I’ll get to that in a minute…). I remember several instances when Carisa was leading the children’s ministry when Frank stepped in on her behalf to speak for her and to guard and protect her. Even the final decision for her to step down was made by him; to take care of her.

I am now in the same position she was. Who is guarding me? Frank was able to step in for Carisa because he knew intimately what her fears, failure, struggles, stresses were. No one knows mine. Who will speak for me?

I know the answer to that question is God, but I hear that from people who have someone to speak for them. When you are physically alone, it is very difficult to believe that you are really not alone.

I am now the only one of my friends not in a relationship. Every close friend I have (in Philly or outside of Philly) has a wife/husband or a boyfriend/girlfriend. (My roommate, Jen, is not in a relationship. However, we are still in the roommate stage and while I definitely enjoy her, we haven’t gotten to the close friendship thing yet. Plus, she is struggling to adjust to her new life and while I am very happy to help her in that, she isn’t quite able to understand me where I am). Why do all of my friends get someone in their lives that wants to know their hearts, while mine stays locked away, unnoticed?

Most of you who are reading this know exactly why; it is very easy to see what God is doing. I am learning to trust Him, rely on Him, seek Him…He is drawing me to Himself. My heart stays locked away in a secret place only He can see. It certainly isn’t unnoticed by Him. And He will speak for me. He is guarding me. I may not know what He is saying, or even who He is saying it to, but He is taking care of me.

At the end of the day, I still go home physically alone. There is no one to see my tears, hold my hand or just be with me. The trade off is absolutely worth it, but right now for me there is a trade off. I am not becoming the person I thought I was supposed to be, but I think I am on my way to becoming the person He created me to be.

I am not traveling the path I thought I wanted, but I am on the path He designed for me.

I am not walking with who I wanted to be with, but I am not alone.

So, how does all of this fit together? This week I faced a lot of hard stuff and had people looking to me to guide them through that hard stuff.

So, I looked up. I saw my very fragile heart resting gently in the hands of a beautiful savior and knew I could follow Him anywhere.

My bridegroom drew me into Himself, and I led others into His throne room.

And we all found exactly what we needed.

Update O'rama!

Wow, I can't believe its been a week since I last blogged. That is very unlike me! I have been busy, but I don't think that's the whole reason I haven't blogged. I have just been all over the place in my heart and in my mind and I didn't know how to even begin to put it into words. In fact, I still don't. But, what I can do is update you on the happenings in my life, and hopefully the personal/spiritual stuff will form into words that I can share soon.

Clubs started back up this week, so I my "normal" schedule is back. I missed the kids and the teens, but I definitely enjoyed having some free evenings.

A lot of changes have been made on my house this week that I am VERY excited about!

First, I have 2 new additions to my kitchen! My parents bought me a new microwave for Christmas and my friends Frank and Jared installed it this week. Isn't it pretty?!?


The second addition isn't a very happy one.


That, my friends, is a small animal trap. Why do I have one? Well, apparently I have rats. Yes, I said rats. Not mice...rats. I have known I had a house guest for a while, but never saw it, I only heard it. Gizmo has gone after it several times, but it escapes under the cabinets before he can get to it. On Wednesday, while Frank and Jared were here installing the microwave, they got a full look at a rat, and it was big. Too big, in fact, for a regular rat trap so they brought over the animal trap. We set it that night and waited. This is where it gets good...get ready to laugh. :)

About an hour after Frank and Jared left we heard the trap snap, and a rat was caught. Of course, we had no idea what to do from there so I called Jared. He came over and put the trap (with the rat in it) in the trash can while he went outside to see if I had a hose. (Apparently his plan was to drown the rat in the trash can).

So, here is the scene. Jared is in the back yard looking for a hose. My roommate, Jen, is standing at the sink filling a pot with water to help drown the rat. I am in the next room, standing on the steps looking over the banister...I didn't want to be anywhere near the action. Unfortunately, when Jared put the trap in the trash can, it released one of the side doors, allowing the rat to get out. I saw the door open and the rat jump out and immediately started screaming; 'The rat got out! The rat got out!". At that same moment, Jen turned around just in time to see the rat jump toward her, then run underneath the cabinet. This caused Jen to scream and run, with the pan in her hand, into the living room, yelling, "It touched me! The rat touched me!"

Jared calmly walked into the house while Jen and I continue to scream; "The rat got out!" and "It touched me! The rat touched me!". All three of us quickly began laughing a the whole scene and didn't stop for a while.

We set the trap again, hoping this was a very stupid rat, and then went to bed.

We woke up the next morning to a rat in the trap. though Jen insisted that it was a different one. Frank and Jared came over and killed it (they drowned it, but this time made sure the door stayed closed), and we reset the trap in case there was actually another rat.

Turns out, there is. Unfortunately, this rat is much smarter. We have seen in crawling around the kitchen several times, but it doesn't go in the trap, though it will climb on top. We think this may be the one we caught the first time and he now knows our plans for him. I'm not sure what we're going to do next, but in the meantime we continue to set the trap and hope he will slip up. (We haven't caught any other rats in the meantime, which we're hoping means there are only 2. We'll see...). Frank and Jared also worked on my bathroom to try and fix a leak. Once this leak is fixed, I can put my ceiling back up in the kitchen. Unfortunately, although we thought it was fixed, there appears to still be a leak. Not nearly as bad as it was, but still too much for the ceiling. I am really looking forward to my kitchen being finished...some day.

On a much happier note, I also got a new dresser for my bedroom!

(Incidentally, the TV you see was a Christmas present from my grandmother in 1991! Its 17 years old, and still works great! Thanks Moi!!) The dresser was the last piece of furniture I needed to make my bedroom an actual bedroom (I bought a wardrobe for my hanging clothes a few months ago since my room doesn't have a closet).


For the last few months my clothes have just been in a pile on the floor. The really exciting part is that I went to Ikea to buy the dresser and on our way to the checkout I decided to check out the As-Is department (things sold at a discount because they have to be bought "as-is", defects and all). As I walked in I saw my dresser!! Well, I had planned on buying a white one, but they had the black one on sale for $80 off, and already put together!! Plus, inside several of the drawers were these dividers, that usually sell for $4 or $5 a piece.

That's another at least $20 value!! I was so excited! The top of the dresser has a few nicks on it, but nothing major. I love this dresser!! All that's left for my room is paint and curtains...and new bedding because a friend of mine accidentally washed my bedspread, ripping it in several places. It feels so nice to be sleeping in a real grown up's bedroom. :)

Jen and I have big plans for moving furniture around, putting things in storage and hanging things on walls. I literally have NOTHING hanging on any walls in any room in my house. I really want that to change. I have to ask someone how to do that since I have weird walls, but we have several paintings, pictures and mirrors to hang that I think will make the house even better. We also want to repaint most of the rooms, get a rug for the living room and EVENTUALLY get a new couch and some new living room furniture. (Right now I have nice furniture that was given to me, but it is really too big for the small rooms in my house. The house will really open up once we get things that actually fit in the house). It's really nice to have someone else around to help out with this kind of stuff!!

Next week looks to be an extremely busy week for me. Kids Club starts back up, and I still have a lot to do to get ready. I will also be leading an AIM trip, which takes A LOT of time. Thankfully, the AIM group is working with Cornerstone, so I won't have to divide my time too much. The group will be leading a special after-school program at the church, though, that I need to plan. I'm not worried about getting it done, but I am worried about doing it well and getting a decent amount of sleep in the process.

We've lost our minds...

We have 2 more kittens!! How did that happen?!? Well, Jen and I are suckers, that's how. We took our original 4 to the vet at the shelter to get checked out and while in the waiting room a woman came by saying that they had just gotten 2 kittens in that really needed a place to go. They were really healthy and about the same age as our kittens, and staying in the shelter wasn't good for them. We were hesitant at first, but made the fatal mistake of agreeing to at least look at the kittens. Once we saw them, we knew we couldn't say no.

So, here are our newest additions!!!

Suki


Shakira

We are still looking for owners for now 5 kittens (anyone??). Tomorrow we are taking them to Jen's home church because some people have expressed interest in them. It will be at least a month before they are big enough to be adopted, but we are actively pursuing future homes for them! The really fun part is that Jen's sister works at a photo studio and is going to take portraits of the kittens! How funny is that?!? Each cat doesn't get their own photo, but we will take some great group shots. Seriously, this is my life...